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Seven ways to turn around a NBA franchise

Kyle Slavin over at The Love of Sports outlines his ideas for turning around a NBA franchise.

Finally, if a player stays on our team for six years, we will completely remodel their house. Eight years, we will pay for one of their kids’ college education. Ten years, and we will name a concourse at the airport after them, and erect a statue in the players’ locker room entranceway. I don’t care if you are a benchwarmer, there must be a legitimate incentive for you to stay on our team, and reverence if you do. Remember the Lakers and Celtics battling for ten years in the 80’s? Well, that won’t happen again without a huge decline in turnover. It will result in better basketball, and more wholesome basketball players. Besides, if Adonal Foyle got to walk past a giant bronze Adonal Foyle before each home game for the Warriors, I guarantee you he would have played better.

I don’t know why, but the thought of an Adonal Foyle bronze statue just makes me laugh.

One thing I’d add – every so often, have an “Adult Night.” NBA dance teams are basically glorified strippers, so why not let them strip? On Friday and/or Saturday night games, only adults can come to the game. The dance team would start off in their usual gear, but as the night wears on, they would change into skimpier and skimpier outfits. By the last “performance,” they’d be topless. I guarantee you, every “Adult Night” would sell out and the opposing team would be too distracted to play well. It would be a hit! (Though I don’t think David Stern would approve.)

NBA’s top 20 international players


The Love of Sports put together a list of the top 20 international players of all-time. It’s a solid list, but I have a few qualms with the top 6:

6. Tony Parker – France
Parker was born in Belgium and raised in France. The captain of the French National Team is lightning quick with the ball and a creative finisher around the basket. He’s won three NBA titles since joining the Spurs in 2003, and in 2007 became the first European player to be named the MVP of the NBA Finals.

5. Yao Ming – China
Yao’s been one of the greatest ambassadors for the game of basketball since joining the Rockets in 2002. The big fella’s steadily improved each year, averaging 22 points, 10.8 rebounds and two blocks per game last season. This past summer, he led China to the quarterfinals at the Beijing Games before an exalted home crowd.

4. Manu Ginobili – Argentina
Ginobili’s been successful at every level of basketball. Before joining the Spurs in 2002, he won a Euroleague Championship while playing in Italy. Then he won three rings with San Antonio, and in 2004 led Argentina to an Olympic gold medal, taking home the tournament MVP award in the process.

3. Steve Nash – Canada
Nash is a fierce competitor who thrived as the general in Mike D’Antoni’s fast-paced offense. He’s deceptively quick, a great shooter and his impromptu passes are a joy to watch. He won back-to-back MVP awards in 2003-04, 2004-05 and was generally recognized as the best point guard in the game.

2. Dirk Nowitzki – Germany
Nowitzki’s one of the most unique players in the NBA, a seven-footer with the ability to put the ball on the floor and range that extends beyond the arc. He led the Mavericks to the NBA Finals in 2006 and was named the league’s MVP the following season, becoming the first European player to win the award.

1. Hakeem Olajuwon – Nigeria
Olajuwon could control a game on the boards by blocking shots or with his fanciful footwork. He carried the Rockets to back-to-back championships and won a gold medal with the U.S. at the 1996 Olympics. “The Dream” was named NBA Finals MVP twice, a two-time Defensive Player of the Year and the first international player to win the MVP award.

Olajuwon at #1 is right, he was unstoppable in his prime. Nowitzki seems to be fading – not statwise, but domination-wise – so I’d have him below Nash, who did win two MVPs to Nowitzki’s one. Besides, you have to give credit to Nash, who looks like he would be a better fit as a roadie for Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers than as a point guard for a NBA team.

I prefer Ginobili to Nowitzki, but I have no real basis to back that up. I just prefer Ginobili’s toughness and willingness to take the ball to the hoops. Dirk settles for too many jump shots. After that, I think Parker has to go ahead of Yao. The big man has simply been too injury-prone to be listed ahead of the talented Frenchman, who has won a NBA Finals MVP and is married to one of the hottest women on the planet…

There was one omission – Tim Duncan. I guess the list maker considers the U.S. Virgin Islands as domestic, and according to Wiki its head of state is George W. Bush (sorry about that, fellas), so I guess technically it is. However, his inclusion would have made for a very interesting debate at #1.

Oh, by the way, I wouldn’t be surprised if we’re adding Portland’s Rudy Fernandez to this list in the next few years.

Couch Potato Alert: NBA Friday

With 12 games on the docket for Friday, there is bound to be a few games worth watching. I’m going to keep my eye on these games…

Trail Blazers (5-3) @ Hornets (4-3), 8 PM ET
The Blazers have won four straight and their first two of a five-game road trip. Rudy Fernandez, Brandon Roy and LaMarcus Aldridge have been outstanding, and they just got Greg Oden back on Wednesday. The Hornets are 4-3 need a win here to get back on track. They are just 2-2 at home with losses to the Lakers and the Hawks. Chris Paul is in MVP form and David West is playing well, but they aren’t getting much from Peja Stojakovic (39% FG%). Byron Scott is (ponderously) only playing Julian Wright in very limited minutes, which is surprising considering how strong Wright came on last season.

Pistons (6-2) @ Lakers (7-0), 10:30 PM ET (ESPN)
Detroit is hitting the second of a back-to-back, so the Lakers have a distinct advantage tonight. Still, if the Pistons are on their game, they can test the Lakers. Allen Iverson is averaging 21.8 points, 7.0 assists and 4.8 rebounds in four games with the Pistons. Meanwhile, the Lakers are still trying to figure out how to use Lamar Odom off the bench and are trying to get something other than defense out of Andrew Bynum. The upside is that Trevor Ariza is starting to look like a star (or at least a starter) in the making.

Kimbo Slice to try boxing

After getting his ass kicked in MMA, Kimbo Slice has now decided to get his ass kicked in boxing. Via SPORTSbyBROOKS.com:

Kimbo SliceWhen a celebrity’s 15 minutes of fame are finally up, for some reason they always turn their attention towards the boxing ring, where they stand in front of hundreds and pummel another “celebrity” all for some “charity”, which in most cases is their own bank account. Danny Bonaduce and Jose Canseco do so on a regular basis. John Wayne Bobbitt is heading into the ring this Saturday. So it makes sense that MMA star Kimbo Slice has apparently decided to revitalize his dying career by giving “the sweet science” a try.

In an interview with Dan Le Batard, Slice admitted that he’s thinking about strapping on some larger gloves, agreeing to keep his feet on the ground, and stepping into the boxing ring. After all, he needs something to do while that weird legal stuff with his MMA contract gets sorted out.

But as MMARATED.COM points this, this move into the boxing world isn’t necessary something Slice should be looking forward to.

MMARATED.COM:

But there is one little detail that might give Slice some pause: In boxing – though the gloves are a bit thicker, a bit cushier – you get punched in the face a lot. And if his recent 14-second TKO loss to Seth Petruzelli at EliteXC’s final show in early October is any indication, Slice does not like to get punched in the face.

If he does make his way into boxing, Slice better enjoy the attention while it lasts. This guy is heading into oblivion (or bolivion as Mike Tyson would say) fast.

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