Damn you, Tim Clark!

Thanks for ruining the weekend of all hack golfers in the world by defeating golf’s stimulus plan, Tiger Woods, on Thursday. We (I confess that I am a hack golfer) live vicariously through every one of his great shots from the fairway that land smoothly a foot away from the pin on the green. Now, we have to hope for another Phil Mickelson meltdown to bring our attention back to the Accenture Match Play Championship. Hopefully, Shaq will reprise his introduction dance from the All-Star Game before Sunday’s nationally-televised game against the Lakers. I mean the Big Shaqtus can really move on the dance floor.

All times ET…

College Basketball
Saturday, 2 PM: Notre Dame @ #2 Connecticut (CBS)
Saturday, 2 PM: #13 Clemson @ #25 Florida State (ESPN Full Court)
Sunday, 12 PM: #10 Marquette @ #6 Louisville (CBS)
Sunday, 2 PM: #8 Missouri @ #15 Kansas (CBS)
Sunday, 4 PM: #9 Michigan State @ #20 Illinois (CBS)

NBA
Friday, 7 PM: Detroit Pistons @ Orlando Magic (ESPN)
Friday, 9:30 PM: Cleveland Cavaliers @ San Antonio Spurs (ESPN)
Saturday, 7 PM: Orlando Magic @ Philadelphia 76ers (NBA TV)
Sunday, 1 PM: Detroit Pistons @ Boston Celtics (ABC)
Sunday, 3:30 PM: Los Angeles Lakers @ Phoenix Suns (ABC)
Sunday, 8 PM: Cleveland Cavaliers @ Atlanta Hawks (ESPN)

NHL
Friday, 7 PM: Montreal Canadiens @ Philadelphia Flyers
Saturday, 7 PM: San Jose Sharks @ Montreal Canadiens
Sunday, 1 PM: Philadelphia Flyers @ New Jersey Devils

PGA
Feb.27-Mar. 1, TBA: Accenture Match Play Championship (NBC/TGC)

Tiger was hoping for a better return than this.

Woods had no complaints with his game or his knee, but he had no answer Thursday for Tim Clark of South Africa, who played 16 holes without a bogey and knocked the world’s No. 1 player out of the Accenture Match Play Championship.

His swing looked as good as it did eight months ago when he won the U.S. Open. His knee felt so strong that when Woods discovered his tee shot into the desert on the 15th hole hit a cart path and went out of bounds — a shot that ended any hope of a rally — he chose to walk 350 yards back to the tee instead of accepting a ride in the cart.

“I knew I had to play out of my mind to beat him,” Clark said.

And he did, pouring in six birdies and constantly putting the pressure on Woods throughout a sunny day in the high desert. Clark won, 4 and 2, when he hit his tee shot to four feet that Woods conceded for birdie after failing to chip in from off the green.