I love this old clip of Chad Ochocinco Johnson from HBO’s “Hard Knocks” several years ago. We get a glimpse of how financially illiterate some pro athletes can be, as Marvin Lewis tries to explain to Chad how banks work.
Then at the end we learn that Johnson basically lives off of McDonald’s food. But anyone over the age of 30 knows that you can get away eating this stuff when you’re young and burn tons of calories, but as you get older you need to start eating better. As a pro athlete, Johnson clearly could handle fast food with all the calories he burns, but now he’s getting older as well. He’s fighting the perception that he’s lost a step, and I’d love to know if he still eats garbage every day.
On the last episode of “Hard Knocks,” Rex Ryan suggested that Mark Sanchez call the plays in the second half of the Jets’ final preseason game. He said that he did the same thing when he was in Baltimore with Ed Reed and Ray Lewis and they were tapping out pretty quickly. Well, Ray doesn’t want Rex Ryan mentioning his name…
Cromartie blamed “Hard Knocks” for making him look bad by telling him to pause when he listed all of his kids on the popular HBO series. For their part, “Hard Knocks” denies this. Anyway, here’s the segment in all of it’s glory.
Free of charge, here are five suggestions of things he could do instead:
5. Go antiquing…with his wife, Gisele Bundchen. What’s antiquing, you ask? Well, it’s the act of shopping for antiques. (Don’t laugh.) The thought of it would make most men want to run their heads straight into a steel pole, but if you could afford to buy anything you want and follow this around all day, you’d make an exception too.
4. Take a cooking class…with Gisele. My mother used to say that nothing tastes better than a home cooked meal. So why not take a cooking class with Gisele? Think of all the fun nights they’d have in the kitchen making dinner – clothing optional. Who knows, maybe this scene will ensue.
3. Wash his car…with Gisele. He wouldn’t be a red blooded American male if he wasn’t out in the driveway doing something on the weekends. So why not wash that new Mercedes, and ask Gisele to pitch in? And maybe she wears nothing but a white T-shirt and some jean shorts? And gets a little wet? We’re just spitballin’ here, right?
2. Go horseback riding…with Gisele. Rent a couple of stallions, hit the trail with the wife and see what happens. Breathe in the fresh air and soak up the sun. Maybe after a little truth or dare, she’ll agree to ride bareback.
1. Go lingerie shopping…with Gisele. How great would it be to go to Victoria’s Secret with a Victoria’s Secret model? Only a handful of guys have that opportunity and Tom Brady is one of them. He should take advantage, and spend the afternoon in the dressing rooms letting Gisele model all that Victoria’s Secret has to offer.
You may recognize ‘Fitzy’ from YouTube. He’s a huge Pats fan and often goes on rants about this or that. This week, he’s reviewing the first episode of “Hard Knocks,’ which is covering the New York Jets training camp. The language is rough, so take the kids out of the room…
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