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2011 Fantasy Baseball Rankings: Relievers

San Francisco Giants Brian Wilson throws the ninth inning against the Texas Rangers in the World Series at AT&T Park in San Francisco on October 27, 2010. The Giants defeated the Rangers 11-7. UPI/Terry Schmitt

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Ah, the fantasy closer. They’ll screw with you just as bad as that hot chick you used to have a thing for back in high school.

Damn she looks good today…No wait, it’s a trick. She’s making me think that I need her to become a winner. Well I don’t. I don’t need her. I’ll just go out with two less attractive girls and I’ll be just fine. Or…yeah, I don’t need any girl! I’m going to punt girls altogether and focus on other things like schoolwork, sports and hanging out with my friends. I don’t need her – I don’t need any of them!..Oh, but look at her. She’s everything I need. She’s way better than two less attractive girls or no girls at all and hey, if she breaks my heart it’s okay. Sure, I would have passed on the two less attractive girls but then I can take on three really, really, really less attractive girls that still might give me what I need in the end. It wouldn’t be so bad…wait, NO! I don’t need her! Stay away from me you freaking serpent woman!

And the cycle continues year after year.

Look, no matter how you want to tackle the conundrum that is the fantasy closer, just make sure you have a plan of attack. If you want to take one of the top guys in the sixth or seventh round, fine. Just know going into your draft whether or not you’re going to invest in saves or take your chances with two or three guys that you select later in your draft. (Or, punt the stat altogether and load up on offense and starters.)

If you want our advice, draft two or three closers in the 12th round and beyond and call it a day. Maybe the combination of Brian Wilson and Huston Street will get you 80 saves, but a trio of Francisco Rodriguez, Leo Nunez and Joel Hanrahan could rack up the same amount and here’s the kicker: you wouldn’t need to invest picks in the seventh and 13th rounds to acquire K-Rod/Nunez/Hanrahan (who can all be had in the 14th round or later).

If you want to take our advice and select closers later in your draft, here are five pitchers to keep an eye on. All of them are projected to go in the 13th round or later in 12-team leagues.

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Panthers looking for an impact player at No. 1?

The Charlotte Observer is reporting that the Panthers are not sold on drafting a defensive lineman with the No. 1 pick and are thought to be seeking an impact player.

Missouri Tigers quarterback Blaine Gabbert throws the football in the first quarter against the Illinois Illini at the Edward Jones Dome in St. Louis on September 4, 2010. UPI/Bill Greenblatt

If the paper’s sources are right, that means Auburn’s Nick Fairley, Clemson’s Da’Quan Bowers and Alabama’s Marcell Dareus may be further down Carolina’s draft board than quarterbacks Blaine Gabbert and Cam Newton, and possibly even LSU cornerback Patrick Peterson (regarded as the best defensive player in the draft).

At least according to the Observer’s sources, the Panthers are concerned about the health of many of the draft’s top defensive lineman. Bowers had his knee scoped and therefore didn’t work out at the combine because he wasn’t in shape following rehab, while Fairley says he’s fine now but revealed that he suffered a small shoulder separation that occurred in a November game against Georgia.

Heading into the combine, Fairley’s name was being thrown around as a possibility at No. 1, but that talk has died down considerably. I haven’t put together my third mock draft yet but if I were today, I would have either Gabbert or Newton going No. 1. I had the Panthers taking Gabbert in my first mock, but then I bought into the hype surrounding Fairley and had him going No. 1 in my second mock. Now I’m back to believing that Carolina won’t take anything but a quarterback with the first overall pick. (Of course, just because the Charlotte Observer says that the Panthers may not take a defensive lineman, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true. How exhausting…)

It’s a good day to be a college basketball fan

Duke University head coach Mike Krzyzewski (L) talks with University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill head coach Roy Williams prior to the teams’ NCAA basketball game in Durham, North Carolina February 9, 2011. REUTERS/Ellen Ozier (UNITED STATES – Tags: SPORT BASKETBALL)

Check out this lineup of college hoops today (all times ET):

12 PM: #2 Kansas @ #24 Missouri (CBS)
The Jayhawks need a victory in Columbia to win the Big 12 outright. They have a one-game lead over Texas with one game to play and are hoping to secure a #1 seed in the Big 12 Tournament as well. Meanwhile, Missouri is hoping to complete an unbeaten season at home.

2 PM: #7 Notre Dame @ #16 UConn (ESPN)
It’s senior night for the Huskies, who have beaten the Irish seven straight times at Gampel Pavilion. Notre Dame can earn the #1 seed in the Big East tournament with a win today and a Pittsburgh loss to Villanova.

4 PM: #19 Villanova @ #5 Pittsburgh (CBS)
Villanova has faded after a strong start to the season, but could still spoil the Panthers’ bid to be the top seed in the Big East Championship if they’re able to upset Pitt on their home floor. The Panthers need a win to solidify their bid to be a #1 seed in the NCAA Tournament.

6 PM: #14 Florida @ #20 Vanderbilt (ESPN)
These two teams went into overtime the first time they met this season and the Gators can clinch the outright SEC title with a win against the Commodores in Nashville.

8 PM: #4 Duke @ #13 North Carolina (CBS)
The ACC regular season championship is on the line as the Blue Devils face the Tar Heels in Chapel Hill. In the first meeting at Cameron, UNC had a 16-point lead before Duke came back to win 79-73. Duke is hoping to be a #1 seed in the NCAA Tournament and needs a win tonight to round out its resume.

It’s not often that there are five Top 25 matchups lined up every two hours like there are today. And don’t forget, #10 Wisconsin plays #1 Ohio State at 4 PM (on CBS) on Sunday.

Coco Crisp had an armed ‘secret service’ following him the night of DUI

The night A’s outfielder Coco Crisp was pulled over in his 2009 Rolls Royce for suspicion of drunken driving, the police say he was being followed by his personal security guards that Crisp described as his “Secret Service.”

From the Arizona Republic:

The Rolls Royce failed to stay in a single lane of traffic and the officer made a traffic stop, police said. The truck also pulled over.

When the officer asked Crisp if he knew the occupants of the truck, he said “there were some issues with some people so the Secret Service was providing security,” the report said.

Two men in the truck confirmed they were Crisp’s armed private security, police said. The officer wrote that Crisp’s eyes were bloodshot and watery and there was “the odor of an intoxicating beverage emitting from the vehicle.”

Crisp told officers he had been to Ra, a sushi restaurant, and Smashboxx, both in Old Town Scottsdale. He drank wine and champagne, he said. He was on his way to drop off a friend at a hotel in Fountain Hills.

After performing field sobriety tests, Crisp was cited for having a blood-alcohol content of 0.08 percent or more, driving with an expired California registration, failure to drive in a single lane and no proof of current insurance, police said.

Coco Crisp needs an armed secret service team to follow him around when he goes out? Who is he, Obama?

Actually, hey, if you feel as though your life may be in danger and you have enough money to pay armed guards to protect you then by all means – security guard it up. The bigger question I have is why he didn’t get one of his two security guards to either a) drive him home in his car or b) leave his car at the club and go back to pick it up the next day.

Three guys go out for the night, one guy is drinking. That leaves two drivers and two vehicles. Coco goes with Sober Driver A in his car while Sober Driver B follows them. Once Coco is all tucked in for the night, Sober Driver A and Sober Driver B drive home in Sober Driver B’s car. Done deal.

This isn’t that hard of a concept. I don’t know why Crisp felt it was a good idea to hire two armed guards to follow him around but he didn’t want to spend the money on a designated driver. Seems kind of dumb if you ask me.

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