Author: John Paulsen (Page 605 of 937)

Fantasy Fallout: Week 14

Everything you need to know (and a lot that you don’t) about the fantasy implications of Week 14.

QUARTERBACKS

Kyle Orton (219 yards, 2 TD, INT) had a pretty nice game against the Jags, and he is a solid start next week against the Saints, assuming the weather is decent…It was a very disappointing performance from Eli Manning (123 yards, TD) though he did throw for a late TD to avoid a totally miserable day…In my book, Matt Ryan (315 yards, TD, INT, rush TD) is the clear cut rookie of the year (assuming the Falcons don’t collapse during the stretch run). He didn’t get the win, but he continued to make plays…Shaun Hill (285 yards, 2 TD, INT) had an excellent day for fantasy owners brave enough to start him against a sketchy Jets pass defense. He has thrown nine TD over the last five games and has Miami and St. Louis over the next two weeks, so he’s a viable starter for owners in need…Brett Favre (137 yards, INT) was surprisingly ineffective against a mediocre 49ers pass defense, but he did run for a TD…Kurt Warner (279 yards, TD, INT) got off to a great start, but didn’t have to throw much in the second half since the Cardinals were so far ahead.

RUNNING BACKS

Joseph Addai (12 touches, 40 yards) left the game with some sort of a shoulder injury, so this is something to keep an eye on this week at practice. Addai’s injury-plagued season has been a disappointment…Jamal Lewis (9 touches, 10 yards) was absolutely brutal against a Titans defense that is only mediocre (fantasy-wise) against opposing running backs. I don’t feel good about the Cleveland offense with Ken Dorsey at the helm…Pierre Thomas (17 touches, 109 yards, 2 TD) saved my proverbial butt in one fantasy playoff this week. He is the clear cut change-of-pace back to Reggie Bush (13 touches, 106 yards, TD)…Steve Slaton (29 touches, 160 yards) had a huge yardage day but failed to find the endzone. The Packers simply can’t stop the run, so over the next three weeks, Maurice Jones-Drew, Matt Forte and Kevin Smith have great matchups…Marshawn Lynch broke a string of three good games with a miserable 14-touch, 35-yard, zero-TD performance, likely knocking any fantasy owners out of the playoffs in the process…Frank Gore (17 touches 65 yards, TD) left the game with an ankle injury and DeShawn Foster (17 touches, 43 yards) took his place. Miami is a tough matchup next week, but in Week 16 the 49ers have the Rams, so Foster may be worth a pickup for owners in need…It’s tough to trust Larry Johnson right now. He only gained 36 yards on 11 carries against a suspect Denver rush defense…Clinton Portis (14 touches, 46 yards) missed much of the second half for undisclosed reasons, which obviously isn’t a good sign. Ladell Betts (9 touches, 60 yards) got most of the work with Portis out, but was ineffective as a runner (6 carries, 3 yards)…Willis McGahee and Ray Rice both left the Sunday night game with injuries, so that leaves LeRon McClain (20 carries, 61 yards, TD) as the potentially only healthy back in the Ravens three-back rotation. A matchup next week with Pittsburgh isn’t ideal…Brandon Jacobs (10 carries, 52 yards) re-aggravated his knee injury. He’s likely to have an MRI early this week.

WIDE RECEIVERS

Marvin Harrison (3-78-1) had another good game at home. On the year, he has posted 31-404-5 in six home games (for an average of 16.9 fantasy points). On the road, he has tallied 20-179-0 in seven home games (for an average of 5.4 fantasy points). He’s a great start next week at home against the Lions…The Giants were ready for DeSean Jackson who didn’t catch a pass and had two rush attempts for -9 yards…Braylon Edwards (3-38) was quiet with Ken Dorsey at QB. I’d stay away from the entire Cleveland offense for the remainder of the season…Jerricho Cotchery (1-10) and Laveranues Coles (1-5) were both awful today…Wes Welker (12-134) outplayed Randy Moss (3-56), who continues to be very spotty this season…

TIGHT ENDS

Visanthe Shiancoe (5-65-1) was the Vikings’ best receiver on Sunday and continues to develop into a viable starting fantasy TE…After a rough first half of the season, Jeremy Shockey (5-64) has 20 catches for 212 yards over the last four games, making him a solid start in PPR leagues. Surprisingly, he hasn’t caught a TD all year…Dustin Keller (2-14) picked a bad, bad time to break his string of four great fantasy games…John Carlson (8-69-1) has posted 14-174-1 over the last two weeks and is a solid start with two great matchups in the next two weeks…Tony Scheffler (5-61) had a nice PPR day for the second straight week…

FREE AGENTS

Now for a few players that might still be on your league’s waiver wire…

Gus Frerotte (70 yards, 2 INT) was knocked out of the game with a back injury and Tarvaris Jackson (105 yards, TD) played pretty well in his place. I wouldn’t trust him to start next week against Arizona…If Joseph Addai can’t go next week, Dominic Rhodes would be an excellent start against Detroit…L.J. Smith (6-44) has caught nine passes in the last two weeks and is working his way back to fantasy respectability…Davone Bess (9-74) had another strong day in PPR leagues. Over the last three weeks he has posted 20 catches for 245 yards and is a better WR option than Ted Ginn right now…Deion Branch (4-88-2) is definitely worth a pickup. The strong performance followed up his 5-56 last week. Seattle has the Rams and the Jets over the next two weeks, so Branch is a sneaky good start during the stretch run. The same goes for Seneca Wallace (212 yards, 3 TD, 47 rush yards), who played great in place of the injured Matt Hasselbeck. Maurice Morris (16 touches, 58 yards) got most of the work in the Seattle backfield…Peyton Hillis (9 touches, 69 yards, TD) left the game with a hamstring injury, so Tatum Bell (13 touches, 66 yards) suddenly gets a boost in value…Tashard Choice (28 touches, 166 yards) saved a lot of sharp Marion Barber owners this week. The Cowboys are really against the wall now, so it will be interesting to see how they handle MBIII next week.

What is Verne Lundquist up to tonight?

I’m watching the Florida/Alabama game and Tim Brando just popped on the screen to preview the halftime show. When he pitched it back to Verne Lundquist and Gary Danielson, the following exchange occurred:

Verne: Tim, it’s great to have you guys with us, it really is. And I look forward to tonight when I know you’ll be the first to pull out your credit card.

Gary: (laughs) We’re going out, I assume.

Verne: This is no night for the squeamish.

What does this mean? Verne is 68, so you wouldn’t expect him to be out too late. But for some reason, I’m picturing an up-all-night Lundquist opening his hotel room door in nothing but an open bathrobe and some tighty whiteys, holding a loaded handgun while a couple of hookers are passed out on the bed. The room is littered with empty whiskey bottles and there are a few lines of cocaine next to a bottle of Viagra on the glass coffee table.

Or is Lundquist talking about eating a steak dinner before hitting the sack no later than 9 PM?

I wish I knew what he was up to tonight.

Highlights from Bill Simmons latest column

The Sports Guy had a few random thoughts this week. Here are some highlights:

When ABC launches a game-show pilot called “Country Singer, Famous Assassin or Kick Returner?” the final question will definitely be, “Who is Johnnie Lee Higgins?”

What would have happened at a 2007 Arkansas tailgate if a blitzed Razorbacks fan offered everyone $100 at 50-to-1 odds that Peyton Hillis would finish with more 2008 fantasy points than both Darren McFadden and Felix Jones? And why do I have a feeling Jerry Jones made his billions in a similar way?

Has there ever been a football player listed as “questionable” more often than Brian Westbrook? Does this extend to other parts of his life? Can anyone rely on him? Do his buddies make plans to see a movie with him knowing that he’s questionable to show up? Does he send back wedding invitations checking both the “Yes, I Will Attend” and “No, I Will Not Attend?” boxes? What would it be like if he hosted a radio show? All right, that’s it for today’s show, I’ll see you tomorrow, or I might not. Why aren’t we calling him Brian “Mr. Questionable” Westbrook?

Not to be a party pooper, but with “The Ageless” Fred Taylor’s career winding down, somebody needs to assume “ageless” status in 2009. I vote for Warrick Dunn because his spin move is like Seth Rogen’s dice-roll dance move in “Knocked Up” — it’s effective the first few times until you realize it’s all he has — only Rogen landed Katherine Heigl’s character and Dunn keeps getting first downs. So there you go.

Hey, is there any way for the Chiefs to hypnotize Larry Johnson into thinking every short-yardage situation is really a crowded bar filled with the boyfriends of women who just resisted his advances?

Note to every lousy cornerback: If your guy has four steps on you for a sure TD, only the QB underthrows him to the degree that the guy has to put on the brakes, stop and jump for the ball, giving you time to reach him and deflect the pass … this doesn’t mean you’re allowed to dance around afterward while waving the “incomplete” signal with your arms, or as I like to call it, “The Deltha O’Neal Shuffle.” Just put your head down and run back to the huddle in shame. OK? OK.

Funny stuff.

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