Bill Simmons is convinced that “Almost Famous” is the quintessential movie of the aughts, so much so that he decided to pull quotes from the movie and apply them to the 2009 NBA offseason. Here’s an example.

3. Some of the stuff that happens is good for a few people to know about, as opposed to, say … a million people.

To Artest. Here’s a classic case of someone hoodwinking the American public with a 10-year pattern of bizarre behavior that eventually immunized them to all future crazy Ron Artest stories and anecdotes, such as the fact that he’s wearing No. 37 to honor Michael Jackson because it’s the same number of weeks that “Thriller” led the charts (um, what?), or his recent revelation that he had been pining to play for the Lakers for two solid years. Artest told reporters that he wandered into the Lakers’ locker room to express that desire to a showering Kobe Bryant — right after L.A.’s bitter Game 6 thrashing in Boston in the 2008 Finals, no less — adding, “Yeah, I walked in the shower. I’m not a homosexual or nothing like that, but Kobe had no clothes on.”

These anecdotes just bounce off people now. Artest is a benevolent crazy. Or so we think. Being around this nuttiness every day is a little different from merely hearing about the nuttiness in secondhand anecdotes. I know for a fact he routinely broke plays on offense and is still a handful behind the scenes, and the Rockets buried every 2008-09 story that would have made this patently clear. For instance, Artest routinely walked around in his underwear in public places: the Rockets’ team bus, hotels, you name it. People around the team barely flinched after a while. Before Game 7 of the Lakers series — only the biggest game of the entire season — they finally flinched.

Here’s what happened: Artest missed the first two team buses (the ones for players, coaches and team personnel) from Houston’s hotel to the Staples Center and barely made the third and final bus, which was reserved for business staff, sponsors and friends of the team. These stunned people watched Artest sprint to the bus right before it left, jump on and take one of the remaining seats … yes, wearing only his underwear. Owner Leslie Alexander happened to be sitting on the bus and witnessed the whole thing. And you wonder why the Houston Rockets didn’t make any effort whatsoever to bring back Artest.

While I believe Artest is an upgrade over Trevor Ariza for the next 2-3 years, he has to stay relatively sane. While Artest walking around in public in his underwear is certainly strange, Simmons is right — it’s not surprising. We’re immune to these types of stories. Ron Artest is crazy. But on the court, he’s pretty much kept it together for the last few years and he can help the Lakers…if he keeps it together. Did I mention that he has to keep it together?

He has to keep it together.

But back to “Almost Famous.” I too loved this movie, and after reading Simmons’ praise for the director’s cut, I’m going to try to catch it real soon. But, to me, the film represents the only time that Kate Hudson starred in anything good. Check out this list of her starring credits from IMDB.com…

About Adam (2000), 6.2 viewer rating
Gossip (2000), 5.4
Almost Famous (2000), 8.0
Doctor T and the Women (2000), 4.7
The Four Feathers (2002), 6.3
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003), 6.2
Alex & Emma (2003), 5.4
Le Divorce (2003), 4.9
Raising Helen (2004), 5.7
The Skeleton Key (2005), 6.5
You, Me and Dupree (2006), 5.7
Fool’s Gold (2008), 5.4
My Best Friend’s Girl (2008), 5.7
Bride Wars (2009), 5.0

Taking out pre-rom-com Kate (“Gossip”), Cameron Crowe’s gift (“Almost Famous”), her stab at the epic period piece (“The Four Feathers”) and her stab at a horror/thriller (“The Skeleton Key”), isn’t she the poster girl for bad comedy? I realize that she’s Goldie Hawn’s daughter, but that doesn’t mean that she’s automatically going to be comedic gold.

Hudson proved in “Almost Famous” that she can act, and she has a reputation for being a hard worker and a joy to be around. But, at 30, she’s at the point in her career where she can put the crappy rom-coms on hold for a while and flex her acting muscle a little bit. She shined in “Almost Famous” because her character had a little bit of grit and a lot of sadness to her. I’d love to see her take on more roles where she doesn’t eventually get the guy before the credits roll.