As I write this, I’m amazed that I could simultaneously post a message on my Twitter account that reads: Writing a new post for Scores Report. Very excited. Still haven’t showered. The thing is, while I’m in awe of the technology, I’m not overly excited about it. I could never fathom why anybody would want to know what I’m doing throughout my day. I imagine that my friends (or “followers”) would finish reading my “tweet,” and have the mental thought of, “God, what a loser. Why would he post this?” Maybe not. However, after reading various friends’ and professional athletes’ Twitter posts, I’m always let down. What was I expecting? These people are just as boring or normal as I am. Instead of sitting here reading what other people are doing, I could be doing something more constructive. So, no, I don’t have a Twitter account. I don’t have a MySpace page or a Facebook account, either. If friends want to know what I’m doing, they can hit me up on my pager. Just kidding. Nevertheless, I do see the upside of certain sports figures posting frequent updates about the state of their teams or careers. It’s just when it borders on the excruciatingly mundane or stupid that I yearn for the days of the telegram.

Upside

On April 24th, those who checked Lance Armstrong’s Twitter learned that French anti-doping authorities had thankfully dropped charges against the cyclist that could have banned him from the Tour de France. Really think about that for a second. This information, which is important to so many people, was available before any media outlet could report it. Yes, blogs have shown the ability to run news and rumors more quickly than traditional media, but Twitter reveals “stories” first-hand, because it comes straight from the horse’s mouth. I think that’s incredible. Of course, there are two sides to every coin, and what one athlete “tweets” can obviously contradict a more truthful report – the kind television and newspaper journalists spend hours putting together. In a society of whirlwind information, we need those institutions now more than ever. Anybody who’s seen Season 5 of “The Wire” can attest to this statement. Although, blogs and now Twitter provide instantaneous content, those who operate them understand their audience and the “quick fix” it expects. What I appreciate about newspapers is the fact that they compile information from a myriad of sources before presenting this data in a single story. Still, it’s only a matter of time before ESPN starts a show called “The Chirp” (or something equally insipid) that does a run down of the best of athletes’ Twitter accounts. If not, they’ll at least include it in their rolling crawl at the bottom of the screen.

Downside

The NFL used Twitter last week to announce draft selections. College coaches are using it to keep prospects informed about their program. These are both creative and relevant uses for the service. Unfortunately, a strong percentage of athletes are frighteningly dumb, and given a medium to express their vanity can both elicit and express their sometimes-poor judgment. Brian Wilson of the San Francisco Giants, who may or may not be a Rhodes scholar, recently “tweeted” about an altercation he had at a bar with some Arizona locals. Though the Giants were on a road trip and likely had a game the next day, Wilson’s last post came at 3 in the morning. I understand the life of a young athlete must be a constant party, even during the season. However, whereas management turns a blind eye because they never see the behavior, Twitter provides incriminating evidence of athletes’ misguided actions. I’m not saying I would be any different. Drop $5 million a year into my bank account to throw a baseball and I’m likely to break at least every ordinance in the Midwest at least once. Add that to the knowledge that thousands of people on the Internet can be alerted of my every move and I’d have to put on a show.

Twitter can also warrant unwanted consequences since it can connect athletes to their fans in a way that’s never before been possible. It seems like more and more often athletes are bothered by an obsessed individual who takes their support a bit too far. Twitter discloses information about who you know and where you go. It can’t be too hard for a potential stalker to get dangerously close to the athlete of their choosing. That is, unless the athlete uses the service wisely, hiding certain personal details about their lives.

Believe me, I’m all for the salty displays of mischief that athletes feel the need to tell us — it makes for an entertaining read. I’m just concerned about the repercussions Twitter can have when management is investing millions of dollars on these guys. Isn’t that why people buy tell-all books, to read about the juicy stuff? Forget that — Twitter makes the information available practically in real time. Still, I’ve never bought a tell-all book. Why? I’ve got my own life to live and don’t want to spend 300 pages worth of time on someone else’s. The raunchy stuff may be good for a blog on a slow news day, but after a while it just confirms the negative side about being a young millionaire. And that can quickly become boring.

The Average Joe

Luckily, this is something you or I don’t have to worry about since injuring our arms, hamstrings, and ankles won’t cost us our jobs. It goes without saying that we can be just as carefree at night without having to face Albert Pujols the next day. Still, posting your debaucheries on Twitter could possibly get you into trouble, say, if you had a tech-savvy boss. “Chris, I was just checking the Twitter mill last night – as I do all my employees – and I noticed you got a public urination ticket a 4 AM before blowing $100 at our local Denny’s.” I know, that’s completely farfetched and I take comfort in knowing I can get away with these things without being fired or punished by someone indirectly involved. Athletes don’t have this luxury, so it will be interesting to see how they evolve in the world of Twitter.