As they continue to work towards signing a new CBA deal, the NFL and NFLPA are in the midst of a media blackout, which basically means that they won’t share any details about how the discussions are going.
In light of this, I’ve decided to compose a mock conversation between a NFL fan (for creative purposes, let’s call him “NFL Fan”), commissioner Roger Goodell and NFL Executive Vice President Jeff Pash using Goodell and Pash’s actual media transcripts from Friday.
Seeing as how they won’t shed any light on what’s actually happening behind closed doors, I figured this would be more entertaining than just posting Goodell and Pash’s highly useless comments.
NFL Fan: Should I cancel my NFL draft party in April, my fantasy football draft in August and my NFL Sunday Ticket subscription? In other words, are we going to have a season next year or what?
Roger Goodell: We are in a media blackout. I’m sorry. I’m not trying to dodge your question. With respect to the process, to George Cohen, to the NFLPA, I think we want to continue to respect that. But we’ve continued to work hard. I think the fact that we are continuing this dialogue is a positive sign.
NFL Fan: You know what else would be a positive sign? If you guys stopped making fans grab their ankles waiting for you to reach an agreement. That would be a pretty positive sign, wouldn’t you say, Jeff? Do you think fans should be optimistic just because you guys have agreed to another extension?
Jeff Pash: I think this is better than the alternative. Should they be optimistic? They know we’re talking. They know we’re working hard. I think that should be a positive.
NFL Fan: Actually, we don’t know that you’re talking or working hard because you a-holes don’t say anything of substance when you do talk to the media. For all we know, your “meetings” consist of smoking cigars, playing Texas Hold’em and watching re-runs of Knight Rider while laughing at how the fans are clinging onto hope that an agreement will be reached soon.
Roger Goodell: We are going to continue to work as hard as we can. I promise.
