Kimbo Slice: The charade is over

I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t really follow the MMA. But it’s hard not to know who Kimbo Slice is considering the star actually graced the cover of ESPN the Magazine a few months ago.

I didn’t catch the fight (I was flipping between college football and the latest Cubs’ postseason collapse), but I had to chuckle when I read that Slice was knocked out in just 14 seconds Saturday night by some guy filling in for the inured Ken Shamrock. And as Dan Wetzel of Yahoo Sports writes, it looks like the Kimbo Slice Show has reached it’s finale.

Kimbo SliceOne simple shot sent Slice to the canvas and from there some guy named Seth Petruzelli needed just 12 punches and 14 seconds to put an end (we hope) to one of the great sporting charades of all time.

It was just a matter of time before Kimbo got exposed. He was little more than a character out of central casting, a bunch of addictive YouTube videos and a lot of insane hype by CBS, which made him a headliner before he made himself a fighter.

He was the Kimbo the Cash Machine, everyone lining up to exploit the lie that this was the baddest man on earth as long as he could walk through hand-picked tomato cans.

Kimbo was KTFO by a guy he absolutely towered over yet was willing to bang with him anyway. Not that Kimbo did any banging. Slice charged him (“He was like a truck,” Petruzelli said) but he never actually landed a punch.

In the end, Kimbo’s hand speed, defense and chin proved incapable against even an average mixed martial artist. Which was pretty much what every hardcore fan had predicted.

Not that CBS didn’t keep up with the Slice willing to fight, “anyone, anywhere, at anytime.” This was a 100 percent true statement if “anyone, anywhere, at anytime” means “no one any good, anywhere, ever.”

Not that I would ever want to go toe to toe with Slice – but what a joke. And is that a M.I.L.F. Hunter T-shirt he’s wearing in that photo? Awesome.

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