Part of the reason the talks between the players and owners fell apart last week was because the NFLPA says the owners’ last proposal would have made salaries a fixed cost and eliminated the players’ chance to share in “higher-than-projected” revenue growth. Pete Kendall, the NFLPA’s permanent player representative, described the league’s offer as “kind of the old switcheroo,” while NFL spokesman Greg Aiello says that the players were in “a hurray to get out of the room last Friday and file their lawsuit.” Aiello also noted that the players never offered a counterproposal before decertifying.

Also, also, also, the players say that the owners took their CCR “Greatest Hits” album without asking and the owners claim that the players ate their leftovers from “La Senorita Mexican Café.”

Both sides deny each other’s claims.

It’s only been a week and already this lockout is making me want to carve out my eyes with a spoon. Know what I think? I think the owners had already made up their minds that they were going to lock the players out when these labor discussions (if you can even call them that) began. But once Judge David Doty ruled that they couldn’t use the $4 billion from the renegotiated TV contracts to fund their lockout, they figured the best way to get what they wanted was to actually sit down with the players.

But by that time, the players knew they had the upper hand and were going to follow through with their lawsuit unless the owners bent over backwards in negotiations. Thinking they would win with Doty if they went to court, they weren’t going to budge on their demands. The two CBA deadline extensions were just for show to make the public think that a resolution may be forthcoming.

As it turns out, Doty isn’t overseeing the players’ case so it appears as though nobody currently has the upper hand. Between draft boycotts, lawsuits, ridiculous slavery comparisons, Roger Goodell’s letter and $1 salaries, it’s amazing the men in charge can even put their shoes on the right feet in the morning. Had the owners and players actually tried to compromise from the start, I wonder if they would have agreed to a new CBA within a matter of weeks. But this entire situation has been a series of missteps by both sides, so here we are.