If Johnny Damon’s mission was to become the most annoying man in baseball this offseason, then he’s already succeeded.

Damon is half a player. As he proved last year in New York, he can still swing a pretty good stick and he still has enough speed in his 36-year-old legs to be dangerous on the base paths. But he’s a liability in the outfield and his arm strength often resembles that of a T-baller. There’s also no guarantee that he’ll be a good hitter outside of Yankee Stadium, so writing that he’s even half a player might be too generous.

How has this guy managed to turn the back half of the MLB offseason into the Johnny Damon hour? He’s the last big name on the market and I use the words “big name” loosely. He’s received offers from the Braves and Tigers, yet he still remains unsigned. Why?

Damon is doing his best Manny Ramirez impression this offseason. Instead of coming to terms with his value and signing a fair deal, he has decided to drag out contract negations as long as possible. Spring training is ready to kick off and he’s still deciding on where and how much to sign for.

Of course, this entire situation reeks of Scott Boras, who is also Manny’s agent. Boras battled with the Dodgers last year over Manny’s contract before finally caving in and settling for a two-year deal. Considering he’s about to do the same thing with Damon, it’s clear that Boras hasn’t learned his lesson yet. Damon was never going to get a multi-year contract for over $10 million like Boras wanted after last season. Yet Boras continues to overvalue his clients and drum up a false market for them by publicly stating tons of teams are interested in his free agents when the truth of the matter is they’re not.

I’ve got a newsflash for both Damon and Boras: Johnny ain’t that good. He should stop with all of the, “I’m a difference maker” nonsense and take whatever deal Detroit currently has on the table. That’s not only advice, but it’s a plea too because I’m sick of reading about when he’s going to sign.

Photo from fOTOGLIF