The Chicago Cubs are the most pathetic team in baseball. Yes, the Kansas City Royals are worse, but not much worse, and no one expected the Royals to be good anyway. The Cubs, on the other hand, have the seventh highest payroll in baseball, so yeah, they should be playing a little better than this.

Let’s look at the stats, shall we?

Hitting
Runs scored: second worst in MLB
Runs batted in: worst in MLB
Home runs: second worst in MLB
Batting Average: second worst in MLB
On-base percentage: second worst in MLB
Extra base hits: worst in MLB

Pitching
ERA: 19th in MLB
K/BB: 23rd in MLB
Wins: 26th in MLB

Now, after reading those numbers, a couple of questions popped into my head:

– How does hitting coach Gene Clines still have a job?
– How does pitching coach Larry Rothschild still have a job?

Now here’s the most important question of all:

– How the hell does manager Dusty Baker still have a job?

This is the most punchless team the Cubs have put on the field in years, and I don’t want to hear a word about injuries. The Yankees are missing two of their biggest sluggers (Matsui, Sheffield) and one big money pitcher (Carl Pavano, who might be done for the year), and they’re doing just fine. In fact, the recurring injuries to the Cubs’ (non)saviors Kerry Wood and Mark Prior only underscore how badly they need to get rid of Rothschild. The man clearly doesn’t know what bad mechanics look like.

So forget bad luck and injuries. The problem is that the players they do have aren’t playing. Eventually, the responsibility for this falls on the coaches, yet the Cubs seem to think that everybody’s doing just dandy. Well, they’re not, and if the Tribune Company wanted to send a message to Cubs fans that they’re just as sick of losing as the fans are, they’d fire the entire staff. From Dusty on down, clean ‘em all out. They’re clearly not getting the job done.

Of course, management will do no such thing. You know why? Because apparently, Cubs fans don’t care how bad the team is. They go to Wrigley no matter what. Not even the resurgence on the South Side has stopped them from packing Wrigley. Frankly, I’m surprised their payroll is as high as it is, since that’s only hurting a bottom line that could be even fatter.

This is never going to end, Cubs fans. As long as the Tribune Company owns the team, management will try just hard enough to keep the stadium filled, but will never try hard enough to win it all. The only hope is for the Tribune Company to sell the team to someone like Mark Cuban, but for as much money as the Cubs bring in each year, the Trib would be fools to give up a cash cow this big. In other words, unless the Tribune Company falls on hard times and needs to sell their assets, don’t expect the numbers in that counter in the right field bleachers to go down anytime soon. Like I said before, pathetic.