Awesome, awesome, AWESOME. Finally, a Series between two teams that have absolutely everything to lose. Chicago hasn’t been there since 1917 (WWI was called The Great War back then, by the by). Houston never advanced to the NLCS until last year. This isn’t like the Yankees or Braves or Cardinals, or even the Marlins, going to the Show. This is history, kids. I can’t wait.
The breakdown, piece by piece:
Starting pitching: Houston, by a nose. What’s that, you say? The Sox have been unhittable of late, plus are extremely well rested to boot? Fine, say what you want, but in this game of Texas Hold ‘em, three of a kind (Clemens, Pettite, Oswalt) beats two pair (Buehrle & Garcia, Contreras & Garland) any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Besides, Oswalt won’t likely pitch again until Game 3, which is next Tuesday, in Houston. Houston may not be as well rested, but they’ll be better rested, if you know what I mean.
Relief pitching: Houston. Sure, he gave up a 900-foot dinger to Pujols in the bottom of the ninth in Game 5, but he’s still Brad Lidge. Most guys don’t have that luxury, and you can bet that Lidge doesn’t throw that pitch again for another 15 years. Chicago’s bullpen has been tough lately, but they flamed out at inconvenient times all year. This would be a most inconvenient time to flame out, which means they’ll do it at least once. Maybe twice.
Hitting: Chicago. The great myth about this team is that they can’t hit for power. Nonsense, through and through. Konerko is the biggest bat, sure, but Iguchi, Rowand, Crede, Uribe and Dye can all go yard if need be. I’m sure they’d love to have a pinch hit bat like Frank Thomas at their disposal, the way that Houston has in Jeff Bagwell (how much do you suppose it killed him to not play in Games 5 or 6 of the NLCS?). But they’ll do just fine with what they’ve got.
Manager: Chicago. Sure, he’s never been to the Show as a manager before, but he’s a fucking lunatic. It’s like when Crash Davis told Nuke LaLoosh to hit the mascot with a pitch. After he did, Crash looked at the hitter, shrugged his shoulders, and said, “I don’t know what he’s going to do next.” The hitter was so freaked out of his skull that he struck out on a pitch a foot and a half off the plate. That’s Ozzie Guillen ball. That’s the Chicago way.
Defense/Intangibles: Chicago. Houston stacks up a lot like the Sox in terms of teams that play great defense and do the little things. But Chicago is better at the little things. They steal more bases, they get runners over, and they generally seem to cause more trouble for teams. Houston doesn’t have that many speedsters, which means that Biggio may be sticking that elbow out like Roger Dorn in “Major League.”
My Pick: Chicago in 6. Sure, it may not be the Cubs, but so what. It’s Chicago, and they’re due, dammit.
